St Joseph's School (Rangiora)

I recently visited St. Joseph Parish last October 2 to request a preference certificate for my daughter, as I was considering transferring her to St. Joseph School. Unfortunately, my experience with the parish priest left me very disappointed and uncomfortable.

During our conversation, he questioned me in an aggressive and judgmental manner about my church attendance and my daughter’s baptism. I explained that I do attend church regularly, though not always in one specific parish, depending on where I am working or staying. However, he dismissed my explanation and said, “You’re a believer but you don’t go to church I don’t understand.”

When I mentioned that my daughter, who is nine years old, has not yet been baptized due to personal and private matters, I made it clear that I wasn’t comfortable sharing details. I gave vague answers, hoping he would understand that those years were very private and sensitive. But instead of showing understanding, he kept insisting and continued to question me, even asking how many times I had moved houses since living in New Zealand to “get to the bottom” of the reason. I felt pressured and uncomfortable, as though I was being forced to disclose personal matters that had nothing to do with my request.

I left the meeting feeling disrespected, judged, and deeply saddened. The conversation lacked compassion, understanding, and sensitivity qualities that I believe a priest should embody, especially when engaging with parishioners seeking help.

This experience made me realize how easily people who genuinely want to draw closer to God can be discouraged by the attitude of those who represent the Church. Because of this encounter, I have decided not to pursue transferring my daughter to St. Joseph School. I want her to grow up knowing the love and grace of God, To have a relationship with Him and practice to be like Jesus, who is the best example of Love, not fear or condemnation. And to experience faith as something living and kind, not merely religious tradition.

I left feeling not just disappointed but genuinely unsettled by the tone and manner of the conversation, which felt entirely out of character for a priest.